Mother's day

Yesterday was Mother's Day. I've never bothered about these 'days' come and go and I would not know if not for all the social media messages. So we didn't have any major celebration planned or anything. Just our usual Sunday meal.

Not until my little one surprised me with a lovely greeting card that she made at school.

Since school was closed for the Spring break in the previous week, she had to hide the card from me for a whole seven days until it was finally Mother's day and she could give it to me. I always knew there was something under the bed, but I had to exercise a whole lot of restraint too in order not to sneak a peek because she forbade me to do so. I succeeded, just as well as she did!

It was overwhelming and yes, it did succeed at reinforcing the joy, the huge privilege that being a parent brings with it. All the sacrifice, pain, efforts equal to nothing when you see a little girl jumping with joy, eyes gleaming, waiting to hand over a handmade gift.

The husband, who seemed a tad jealous of the two of us frolicking around (though he would never admit it), watched from a distance, asking why there was no card on Father's day. Yes, why not? I must drop the hint to her female class teacher when I meet her next.

The Silkworm (Cormoran Strike # 2) by Robert Galbraith

It was revealed a little after the Cuckoo's Calling was published that Robert Galbraith is simply a pen name for J.K. Rowling. Well, well! After reading Casual Vacancy, I'd vowed to myself never to pick up a Rowling again. I could not deal with the author of Harry Potter debasing herself to such an extent. Sigh!

But a Rowling by another name... that was different wasn't it? The reviews looked decent so I picked up Cuckoo's Calling and was surprised by the quality of writing. I actually enjoyed it. The plot by itself wasn't much to write home about. But the characters were adorable, just like in HP.

Ever since, I had The Silkworm on my reading list for the local library. I didn't think it warranted a purchase as I didn't find CC that great. After about a couple of months of tracking the book every time I went to the library, I finally laid my hands on it three days ago. And wasn't it worth the wait!

Cormoran, Rowling's detective has evolved and the way the book progresses is reminiscent of Agatha Christie's slow and relaxed style. The plot itself is complicated and keeps the reader guessing. The character of Robin, Cormoran's assistant is so good you can feel her pain at being torn between love for her fiance and loyalty to her boss.

I subjected myself to three nights of sleep deprivation simply because the book was impossible to put down. I can't wait for the third one in the series, and that one, I plan to purchase.

This is a sequel but is pretty independent of the first one, so you could easily pick up #2 before #1 in the series. But once you read The Silkworm, please don't go back to Cuckoo's Calling.

If you are a Rowling fan, and irrespective of whether you liked Casual Vacancy or hated it like I did, please do read The Silkworm. It is such a treat! If you have never read Rowling before, do make haste.

Book Review: Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn (no spoilers)

I am a book person. I prefer to read the book over the movie, or at least before watching a movie adapted from the book of the same title. I think that the picture that a book can paint for you cannot be converted into equivalent screenplay no matter how talented the director. I maintain this without exception. There is only one movie that I have seen in my life that came very close to the book: Only Love based on Erich Segal's book of the same name. I think the strength of the movie was in the beautiful music, something that Segal brilliantly described but could not bring to life. The film director could.

Anyway. So the book I want to write about is Gone Girl. Without giving away too much, the protagonist couple has their differences, and one fine day the wife goes missing. The author then takes us through a journey of lies, disbelief and mistrust.

The book starts off slowly and I know of several people who gave up about a third into the book. The ones who persisted emerged spellbound, for Gone Girl is a story you can love and hate at the same time. You can despise the characters but you will love the author for his craftiness, his handiwork, his sheer audacity in penning a story like that. It is simply superb.

I could do a more detailed review but I'd rather you read the book than read this review!

Do not miss Gone Girl. And yes, read it before you watch the movie.

Our tryst with the Louvre Museum

We had (as you can safely assume if you know me) a fully planned itinerary of Paris about two days before we left. As luck would have it, it rained on morning one and we had to rehash our entire plan. Imagine deviating from a plan, my plan! I had to actually live with it.

The husband urged me to stop crying and dragged me to the Louvre museum. Let's stay indoors while it rains and catch up on your plan later, he said. As it turns out, every tourist in Paris was probably in the same boat. At least they were under the same roof - the roof of Louvre Museum.

There is a separate entrance to the Louvre from the nearest metro station and that route lacks signs of any kind to the entrance hall. When we did manage to reach the entrance, we saw people standing in the queue with tickets waiting for a security check. We turned back and asked someone on the way where we can get tickets and were directed to this little kiosk selling souvenirs and cigarettes. The queue snaked away and we diligently awaited our turn. An hour later, we had the tickets and proceeded towards the museum.

When we got in, we realised that there were at least four different ticketing counters in the grand entrance hall, long after you had made way through the security. You didn't need a ticket to get through security at all. We could've saved at least forty minutes, if not more. It took a lot to put that disappointment behind us but we did eventually and moved in.

The museum is HUGE and that would still be an understatement. If you ever meet a first time visitor to the Louvre who admits to not feeling overwhelmed about where to begin, I want to meet them. The brochure helps by pointing out the main attractions in each section but seriously, what scale! It was crowded all right but the gigantic building seemed capable of holding it out.

We headed out to see the Mona Lisa, which apparently draws the maximum crowds. Our little daughter said she was 'disappointed that it was so small'. I couldn't disagree in a way. The wedding feast in the same room looked far more impressive.

Frankly, there isn't one single section worth missing. The paintings, art, history, engrossed us for the next three hours before our legs gave way, our patience waned and our bodies pleaded out.

It was still raining when we came out so we decided to head back to the hotel hoping to get back on to the list the next morning. There was the satisfaction of having visited one of the world's most famous museums, bungling at first, but all worth it in the end.

Time and tide...

I walked into our local supermarket the other day, picked up the basket, brought up my 'list' on the mobile and began to pile in the groceries. It took me a while to realise (and fathom) that a tall, Dutch man was sort of looking at me. Later, I was evaluating breakfast cereals when he came up, excused himself, brought a box down from the top shelf and then, hold your breath, flashed me the sweetest smile. I returned it, unsure of what was happening. I had to appear composed and hide the blush that I was worried was appearing on my face.

I moved to the dairy section and the same thing happened. The man was flirting! Gaawwd. Can it still happen to me? Dressed in a casual tee, dirty sneakers, no make-up? To a five foot one inch Indian woman in her mid-thirties? I felt like clapping my hands in glee; with the discovery that I still had it in me! Hilarious, I told myself. Enough, my conscience opposed. The man appears far older. He's not even that good looking. And probably desperate. Is that so flattering after all? Suddenly I didn't know where to look.

I checked out, got back home still flushed, sat myself down with a glass of water and laughed. I remembered a similar incident a couple of years ago. We'd recently moved to Germany and on one of our earliest travels within the country, I took my daughter to a bakery to buy a doughnut. The young Sri Lankan man behind the counter flirted with me brazenly even with the kid in my arms. I walked back to my husband shaking my head, and reported what had happened, wondering how he would react. Would he be angry with the Sri Lankan? See the man's nerves, I added, just to make my position clear. Why? Don't you feel flattered? In fact, why don't you leave the child with me and go back alone to get me a doughnut, he joked. I looked for sarcasm in his tone. But he had an amused smile. Go enjoy it. It's not everyday that someone is going to flirt with a happily married mother in her thirties.

Now as I got bustling around the house, I stopped to look at myself in front of the mirror. Not bad, I beheld. Yes there were a few extra kilos that I'd like gone and yes, I could do with a facial and a manicure. But it often takes an external stimulus to remind us to love ourselves for who we are. I vowed to make more space, spend more time for myself, to do more of what I loved to do. Not in the hope that another man would notice me, but for me to notice myself more often!

Book Review: The Girl Next Door by Elizabeth Noble

I am suddenly back into the reading habit. It feels great because I have been away from books for so long. Did catch a few on the Kindle but the smell, feel, texture and romance of physical books... umm.. that's something else.

The Girl Next Door is the story of the inhabitants of a specific building in Manhattan. What better setting to produce the story of intertwining lives than that! The story starts off a bit tediously as Nobel begins to describe each household in detail. Albeit, the characters are very articulately developed and I remember hardly any titles where the nuances in human relationships are so beautifully captured and described.

As a reader, you are aware that the characters will start to cross ways soon enough but how and when? Then mid-way the pace picks up as the reader is cleverly led from one story into another and the connections start to get clearer.

The last part of the book is rather cliched and the author's temptation to take every story to a 'happily ever after' stage is not very appealing. In real life, and that's what the book's characters are - very realistic, people don't necessarily end up tying all the loose ends. That is where the book fails to impress, according to me.

My rating: 3 out of 5

Absence makes the heart grow fonder

The saying can't be more right for me. I am now ensconced in the Netherlands. Have to admit that I feel far far better than I ever felt away from home. Eindhoven is a lively, beautiful city that casts a friendly net on its inhabitants. It is so much easier to live (peacefully) than it ever was in Stuttgart. 

But with every passing day I crave for my own. My family, my homeland, my people, my way of life. On some days the distance crosses my mind, lingers on and drifts away. On others, and these are not necessarily the bad days, it fills me up and refuses to go away. My heart aches, the eyes swell up and my legs look for support.

Moving abroad seemed an exciting prospect when it was proposed. It would give my husband the much needed career fillip and international exposure, an investment for a better future. It was a 'head' decision. Economics simply outweighed any other parameter in the decision making process. But when we began life afresh on the new soil, it has always been the heart, thrashing about for attention, clamouring for its rightful position, shouting out bloody neglect.

We moved from Germany to the Netherlands for better prospects - an international school, lower language barriers, better housing. But what hasn't changed is the constant longing for home. If I may say so, it has only increased. 

People tell me if I stay here long enough, the heartache will reduce and I will get more comfortable. Time heals everything, I know that. But then time simply makes the ordeal less unpleasant, trying to smooth out wrinkles but it never takes away the pain completely. 

I am simply not the one to live with this heartache. Perhaps I am just not made for foreign shores. 

I'm hardly settled here but I can't wait to start packing and move back to India! Please let the sun rise on that day soon soon soon!

Passport renewal - Indian Embassy at Munich

Sometimes, one sets expectations based on past experiences of your own and of others around you. When significantly lowered expectations are met, the result is happiness. However, when they are exceeded beyond imagination, the consequence is elation! Our passport renewal experience from the Indian Embassy at Munich was one such refreshing, surprisingly smooth experience.

We (my husband and I)applied using the online application process detailed on the website. There is a jurisdiction set up for each area, so better check on the site on where exactly you would need to apply based on where in Germany you are located. After a call to the Embassy that was courteously answered, we learnt that there is no need to set up an appointment. One can walk in and submit the documents Mon to Fri between 0930 and 1230. The old passport need not be submitted along with the documents.

We reached early on a Tuesday, hoping that we would not need too much time. However, there were only two other people and our work was done within fifteen minutes. The officer at the window was extremely polite and helped us very patiently through an additional declaration that we needed to write out for endorsement of spouse names in each other's passports. We paid the fees and submitted self attested copies of all the required documents - passport including first and last pages and latest German visa, address proof (only in my case as I was requesting a change in address), marriage certificate copy and photograph of marriage (for spouse name endorsement). We also had to submit two passport photographs (5 cm x 5 cm size against a light or white background). We were told that we would receive a call within three to four weeks after our new passports were ready and either of us could come to submit the old passports for cancellation and pick up the new ones immediately.

I learnt that there is no formal tracking system but did not expect much trouble since all our documents were in order. After all, an Indian who manages to get through a German visa can hardly be expected to be cheating on his passport documents!

In EXACTLY three weeks, we received the said call from the Embassy notifying us that the passports were ready. I went down to Munich two days later and collected the new passports. The same gentleman who had accepted our documents chatted with me at the window as he worked to cancel our old passports. I was out of the office within five minutes.

A cold foggy day in Munich rendered warm by the friendly and courteous staff. A hassle-free experience due to the efficient, timely processing. What more can you ask for? I was elated to be served in this fashion, when in fact, I should have expected it in the first place. We, Indians, have a way of demeaning our people and our nation for no reason sometimes. A practice I must stop following!

Useful links:
Embassy website - Munich
http://www.cgimunich.com/

Online passport application form (common for all NRIs)
https://passport.gov.in/nri/Online.do

Fussy Fruit Eater Recipes - Oats - Apple - Almond Kheer

My daughter has become an incredibly fussy fruit eater since we have landed in Germany. Partly, I don't blame her. She loved fruits like fresh figs, chickoos, small velchi bananas in India that are not so widely available here. Besides, she hates the whole citrus group, which leaves her with very little choice - bananas, apples, occasionally melons. She won't touch pears or strawberries or grapes :((

Consequently, I'm constantly on the look out for recipes to which I can add fruits. And like a whole host of mothers out there, I have to cheat to up the nutritional quotient of food. It makes me very proud when I succeed :)

Here's a recipe that she digs. The fibre from the oats, fruity sweetness of apples and the goodness of almonds makes it a winner for her and for me!

Oats - Apple - Almond Kheer 

Ingredients:
3 tsp oats
1/4 apple
3 tsp sugar
2 tsp almond powder
1/2 cup water
1 cup milk
a small pinch of cardamom powder

Method:
Heat a vessel and add the oats. Dry roast them for a minute or so until they release a roasty aroma and then add water. Stir frequently. Add sugar. Adjust the taste of sugar according to how sweet the apple is, or how much sweet your little one likes. When the oats start to cook, add the milk. I find adding water and letting it boil before adding the milk makes the oats cook faster. Add the cardamom powder and almond powder and cook for about 3-4 minutes, stirring well. Add the apple - grated or cut into small pieces depending on your choice. Don't cook the kheer too much after adding the apple. Done. Serve it to your little one and see it go down quickly! :)

Variation
You could add bananas, strawberries, pears, chopped dates, walnut powder or even serve it up without fruits!

Until 35

I realise that I haven't been particularly happy with my life over the last few months. The reasons are many and I do not want to get into those here. Ironically, I am in a new land and there is so much that's 'new' in life. Ideally there should be no space for boredom but my own motivation to make the most of the situation is not exactly sky-rocketing!

Inspired by a post that I read on facebook, I've decided to create some excitement, vowed to live by a new pledge to keep me going. Further, I think I already do a lot for others around so I've decided that this is going to be about 'me'. About doing things that make me feel good inside.

So here's my new campaign: "Until 35". And what it entails is that I am going to target the following until my next birthday, when I turn 35:
- I want to see 35 new places
- I want to find 35 ocassions for pampering myself
- I want to find 35 things that I like about myself and my life
- I want to make 35 new things - could be food, or other
- I want to gift something to 35 people with the intention of simply feeling good

I intend to build this list as well as populate it as I go along. But then it has to be flexible enough to allow me to have fun too. The last thing I would want is another binding! My new diary to record notes is ready and I feel so electrified already!